Dear Sasha

I took Sasha to her annual check up last week and some surprising news came up that I didn't expect. When they brought her back in from weighing her, the vet tech told me she weighed eight and a half pounds. I could feel myself frowning. I asked what she had weighed the last time we were there. I knew it definitely wasn't in the eight pound range. She is usually at the top of the nine pound range and I'm always very careful about the amount of food I feed her. The tech looked at her chart and told me she had lost a pound. I didn't like the sound of that. I actually had not even noticed. It made me nervous. The veterinarian came in and told me all the reasons this could have happened, including kidney disease, which is very common in older cats. Sasha is about middle aged at nine and a half years old. I luckily had a general health profile done on her last year with a series of tests, which all came back normal. They decided to do another one this year to compare the results. I was praying she was only dehydrated. Unfortunately, her tests came back with elevated numbers pertaining to her kidneys. The next morning, I took her in for a urinalysis. This would tell them if it was actually her kidneys, or dehydration. I took her in the morning, hoping she had some urine already, but she didn't, so they had to keep her for several hours until she had to use the bathroom again. I cried when I left her. I was so afraid for her health, and I know she didn't want to be left there. She hates the vet. I just wanted to hold her and tell her it would be alright. Sasha is my first child, really. That may sound silly to those of you who don't own pets, but it's true. She's my family. She's been with me through everything, for so long. She's been my pal, my confidante. She's consoled me when I'm sad and has experienced my happiness. I love her very much. I returned that afternoon to pick her up. As I sat in the waiting room with Hayden on my knee waiting for the veterinarian, the receptionist asked me, "How old is your baby?" "Nine," I replied. She raised her eyebrows in surprise. "Nine? Like, nine months?" Me: "Oh. My human baby?" Laugh out loud! I had been so worried about my "baby" all day, I thought she'd been talking about the cat! Ha! The veterinarian called us back (after much fluttering about my human baby from all the techs and receptionists, Hayden receives love everywhere she goes.) The veterinarian did inform me that Sasha had the beginnings of kidney disease. It hurt my heart so much and I was in shock. She reassured me she was in very, very early stage one; and that this is nothing that will affect her for most likely years to come. She would be putting Sasha on a special dietary food to slow down the disease. Still. I am crushed to know what is going to take her in the end. As slow progressing as it is, this is a terminal disease. I talked to my friend Erin about it, who used to be a vet tech. She reassured me that she had seen many cats with kidney disease that live ten plus years, and that the diet really helps. It just hurts and takes some getting used to. I always thought Sasha was going to be one of those cats that live to be twenty years old, and that Hayden would grow up with her. And look, I know-- the reality is, our pets eventually pass away. We eventually pass away. Our loved ones, too. It's the circle of life, and all that. I know we're all here for a limited amount of time, animals and humans alike. It's just not a pleasant thing to face at all. I hate even thinking about it. I know it will hurt and I know it will cry, and I know I will grieve; and that's the worst feeling on the face of the earth.
I don't want Sasha to get old, sick, or hurt. If it comes time that her quality of life is no longer viable, then I will be her friend and her mommy and do what I have to do to help her. As Will keeps telling  me, until that day comes, we will love and appreciate Sasha every day. I showered her with attention before the baby, and I know she's felt a little sidelined since Hayden was born. I'm making sure she doesn't feel that way any more. She's getting as much love as possible. It's also funny how God knows what's coming up in our lives and He works to provide for us-- these tests and medical bills for Sasha were several hundred more dollars than I had expected to spend at just the annual exam. This particular paycheck was the first time that they aligned just right calendar-wise that I did not owe a mortgage payment or a truck payment, so we had the  money to afford the tests without putting it on our credit card (I would've if I had to, but I love being debt free.) I had been looking forward to saving that money, but she was worth every penny. I called Will to let him know what the costs were at the vet's office. "So?" he said. "She's our daughter." And THAT is why I have the best husband in the world. Kitty, too. We love you, Sasha.

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Busy Weekends!

We're constantly on the go. Having a child has only mildly slowed us down. She's now part of our frenzy. We're actually pretty tame Monday-Friday. We have a set schedule of wake (gym for mommy) and play in the mornings, lunch with my parents, and we run our errands if we need to in the afternoons. It's the weekends that get a little hairy. And I take full responsibility for that. We are still living in Clear Lake, in the midst of my friends, and there is always something! I'm lucky that Will is laid back enough and loves me enough to just go with the flow with whatever I want to do. He never complains. I actually have to schedule down time. Like, "we aren't doing anything this weekend." The last two weekends before Hayden was BORN, I had to actively say "no" to people. I usually don't say no. Not because I can't... well, sometimes. I just like to be a good friend.
Last weekend, we went to a benefit for [one of] my best friend's Wendy's friend, who is very ill with leukemia at MD Anderson. Wendy had drove down from Austin and didn't have anyone to go with her. I couldn't stand the thought of her sitting by herself, and I wasn't able to go to the benefit she threw herself some weeks before, so we all three loaded up and went to Jackie's Brickhouse. I thought it was a restaurant, but it was, well.... a bar. Oh my God. I have a baby. In a bar. A la Sweet Home Alabama. Luckily, we stayed outside in the covered area with a live band, and there were other children there also. The dark, rowdy bar people were partying it up inside like it was midnight instead of 1:00 pm on a Saturday afternoon. We had a good visit with Wendy and donated to a special cause, so all in all, it was fine. We left from there and skipped on over to Seabrook to my friend Lauren and Josh's for their little boy Landon's fifth birthday party. Lauren gave birth just two months after Hayden was born to their little girl, Morgan. I know Hayden and Morgan will be good friends one day. I've been friends with Josh for over ten years, and when he began a relationship with Lauren about six years ago, I just fell in love with her. She's dear to me. There were cars everywhere when we arrived to the party. Like, an overwhelming number of cars. We walked in the door to chaos. Probably about (at least) thirty five adults, and twenty kids, if not more. People were everywhere. I knew a few people there, but no one I'm particularly close to. Lauren is of course running around like crazy. So it's that awkward party, where you're just standing there, holding your kid, not really much to do, trying to make small talk with people you don't know or haven't seen in years. Weeeee-irrrrd. But I was there for Lauren and Josh. However, we didn't make it long. Will and Hayden were exhausted. We stuck around for about forty five minutes, sang happy birthday, dropped off our gift, and came on home. Whew.
Now this weekend? This weekend is another matter entirely. I've been both looking forward to and dreading this weekend, just because it's going to take some planning and mommy skills on my part, and I'm going to rely heavily on Will for his help. I know he's up to the task. I just worry (a little) when I'm not right on hand to tag team. But, he's more than worthy of the challenge. Tonight, I'm heading over to my girlfriend Jennifer's, because she and my lifelong friend Spring are throwing a "passion party." If you don't know what that is, well... it's a party.... where you can buy "passionate" things. Just put your imaginination to it. Yep, you got it. Will is on daddy duty tonight, but hopefully she'll be asleep most of the time. I'll be home at a reasonable hour, because bright and early tomorrow, at 7:00 am, I have to be across town checking in for my B.I.G. Love Cancer Care 5K fun run. I convinced several people to join Team Claire and helped raise $2275.00.

Claire is a friend of Laken, who is my very best friend Jennie's little girl. Claire went to Texas Children's with pneumonia, where they discovered a baseball sized tumor attached to her heart, spleen, and diaghram; and it has subsequently spread to her lungs. This little girl is just the sweetest, ya'll. Breaks my heart. It also just kills me, because I look at my precious, precious, sweet, loving, happy baby girl and I can.not.imagine. I can NOT imagine the devastation, the helplessness. Oh. I can't go on. It's too much. So, to do something in honor of Claire, Jennie and I are running the fun run and then (if Hayden is up to it) going to a benefit for Claire's family in the afternoon. SUNDAY, if we ever make it that far, Will and I are going to the Houston Texans versus the Tennessee Titans game at Reliant Stadium with my brother Grant and his [new] girlfriend, Destiny. I am very excited for both the game and to meet Destiny. Everyone has met her but me. Even Will. So Hayden and I are the final pieces to her puzzle. It's been said that she is beautiful, funny, sweet, and witty. Hm. I approve! Grant has not been in a serious relationship in several years. This is a big step for him. I've been praying for him to find a good girl that will be good to him, and vice versa, for a very long time. I think it's something he needs and wants in his life. He will be 31 in less than a month. It's time. Grant is eighteen with twelve years experience. He is very mature and serious when it comes to his professional life and work. However, his downtime is spent with his single guy friends, most of whom are bitterly divorced (God love 'em.) I'm ready to see Grant settle down with a girl who is a good match for him. I don't think he's as happy with the single life as he thinks he is. Since Destiny has come along, I think that is more apparent to him than ever. He is taking her to NYC next week for vacation. I hope they have a good time! So, Sunday-- the Texans game. My parents will keep Hayden while we cheer on the number one team in the NFL to victory! Go Texans! Wish us the strength and resilience to make it through the weekend! It will be a fun time!

Some pictures from the benefit last weekend:

 

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It's Official-- We're Parents...

Well, it's finally happened. Children's television has taken over our living room at every hour of the day. I'm not sure if I even know what adult programming is anymore.
I even know the songs. I sing them to Hayden when we change diapers, when we get out of the bathtub, when she cries. I've been told this is a Mommyhood Badge of Honor. That you have to learn the songs. I even have my own personal favorite part of each show. This morning my mom was talking to me in the living room and had to call me out of my trance, because I was watching the show with my own child-like intensity. What is happening?
Disney Junior. That is what's happening.
I know Nick Junior is the "in" thing right now, and we watch it sometimes. But we are really into Disney Junior. Maybe because I grew up on the Disney Channel, or because I'm a closet Disney nut, but whatever it is, we love it.
Let me give you a little inside.
First and foremost, Hayden and I both  are crazy about Small Potatoes. It's not even a long show; it's just a three minute commercial filler. But we both get really excited. She starts kicking her little legs and screeching at the tv when they come on (or... when we're repeatedly watching them on YouTube because we didn't get our daily fill. No kidding.) Those stinkin' small potatoes with their little accents and catchy songs. They're cute little analogies and explanations for everything. I love those small potatoes (whose names are Olaf, Chip, Nate, and Ruby. Ruby being the personal favorite. I'd like to think she's a lot like me, that little small potato.) Here's a Small Potatoes for you. I'll let them introduce themselves.

Another show we enjoy, as well as Daddy, is Octonauts. The Octonauts are eight adorable little creatures that cruise the sea in their Octopod ("Explore! Rescue! Protect!") There's Captain Barnacles, the brave leader of the Octopod, Kwazii Kitten, who is the daredevil pirate ("Shiver me whiskers!"), Tweak bunny (the Octopod's engineer) who talks with an accent reminiscent of somewhere deep in Mississippi, Professor Inking (I had no idea octopus had ears...), just to name a few, but my favorite is Tunip the Vegimal just because he is so darn cute. His little language with the other vegimals is endearing. My (ahem... our) favorite part is at the end of each episode. There is a song sung about whichever sea creature is the highlight of each show called "Creature Report." It is very educational and catchy. ("Creature report! Creature report!" stomp stomp!) They sign off with, "We're done with the mission...... Octonauts at ease! Until the next adventure!" Sigh. I know. I'm losing it, aren't I?

We are just all lovey about Little Einsteins. Baby Einstein is already huge in our home. DVDs, lullaby CDs, toys, books, entertainer, the works. So we were thrilled to discover Little Einsteins. I actually look for it to come on because it's my favorite theme song of all the shows ("We're going on a trip in our favorite rocket ship! Going through the SKY! Little Einsteins!") Of course all four of the characters are ethnically diverse. They focus each show around a different composer, which is in keeping with the classical music of Baby Einstein. The show is based around both art and music (Red Rocket doesn't move fast.... he moves prestissimo!) It really encourages cultural arts, which I love. I think cultural arts is hugely important in a child's life (in all of our lives, really.) It is definitely something I will strive to integrate into Hayden's life, so I'm happy about having a cartoon to back me up! 

An early morning favorite: Charlie & Lola. Charlie & Lola were the first sign of the beginning of the end for me. When I realized that Hayden was enjoying television (I noticed her watching what I was watching.... then the Baby Einstein DVDs confirmed it. Yep, she likes tv) and I turned to Disney Junior, Charlie & Lola was the first early morning show for us. Again, with their little British accents. I'm such a sucker. Plus, they are siblings who take such care of each other. Charlie starts off each show with, "I have a little sister, Lola. She's small; and very funny." Charlie always teaches Lola something or steers her in the right direction. It's really so sweet. I thought the show was so wonderful in that it reinforces how we should treat our brothers and sisters. I can just hear myself saying, "Hayden... you shouldn't say those things. Does that sound like something Lola would say to Charlie?" Yep. I'm a goner.

Another early morning favorite is Chuggington, whose theme song runs a tight race with Little Einsteins. ("CHUUUG-ington! Chugga chugga chugga chugga CHUGGINGTON!") Chuggington is a town for talking trains with jobs to do! It mostly revolves around the "train"ees, little trains who are learning how to be big chuggers! They are Wilson, Brewster, and Koko. Wilson is a multi-function engine that is always learning that he needs to follow directions. Brewster is a very strong diesel electric train, but always overly cautious. Koko and Wilson make fun of him a lot, but I think he's a leader! And Koko is a feminine passenger engine that is very competitive-- she's very fast, and always trying to make Brewster feel inferior, which I don't think is very nice. She always learns her lesson and apologizes though. Each train on the show is a different model of train. Old Puffer Pete is a turn of the century steam locomotive. Zephie is a trolley.

Next up: "Gaspard and Lisa! Gaspard and Lisa!" Gaspard and Lisa are best friends who live in Paris, France. They are six year old puppies and sit next to each other in school. Gaspard wears a blue scarf, and Lisa wears red. They always try to do good deeds, but sometimes their antics get them in trouble. When they have a problem: "Catastrophe!" and when they solve it, "Triumph!" I like that they always lean on each other and use teamwork to solve their problems.

And last but not least, Mickey Mouse Clubhouse. You can't watch Disney Channel without a little Mickey. It would be a crime. He is accompanied, of course, by Donald, Daisy, Minnie, Pluto, Goofy, and occasionally Clara Belle. This isn't a Mickey cartoon (necessarily) like I used to watch. It's 3D animation. Much different if you grew up on regular cartoons like me. Along with his usual Mickey-isms, there is the Hot Dog song that ends every show. Hayden goes crazy for the Hot Dog song. "Hot dog, hot dog, hot diggity dog, it's a brand new day, whatcha waitin' for? Get up, stretch out, feet on the flooooooor..... hot dog, hot dog, hot diggity dog!") Goofy has the best dance of all, and if I have the chance, I do the Goofy dance right along with him. Hayden kicks her little feet when the Hot Dog song comes on. We heart you, Mickey!
A few others that we are becoming acquainted with are Choo Choo Soul (still trying to figure out that conductor, but her engineer is pretty handsome. Another three minute show a la Small Potatoes), Timmy Time (which has no words, but I really like that lamb), Imagination Movers (four dudes that sing and dance ridiculously to entertain toddlers.... awesome), and Jungle Junction (because I'm curious and intrigued by a jungle ran by jungle animals on wheels.)
So, there you have it. The Lukers and Disney Junior, together forever. At least for the next several years. I'll never let her watch that horribly plum dinosaur Barney (I'll gouge my ears with an ice pick if I ever hear that blasted I Love You song come out of her mouth) or Sponge Bob Square Pants, that despicable and repulsive sea creature with his geometrical leggings and filthy attitude. Nope. We are on the Disney Junior train! So I'll leave you with a little gift: one of my favorite Small Potatoes. Go on, watch it. It'll only take a minute.

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Go Dynamos!

Will and I had a night out to ourselves to celebrate our friend Ashley's birthday. Ashley is a huge soccer fan (he's a Brit) and so we all met up to see the Houston Dynamos play in their new stadium. I've never seen a Dynamos game in live action before. They've won several championships, so they are a pretty good team. It was a great night for us to get together with friends, and we had a great time. We are lucky to have good friends to have fun with! Joining us were Ashley (of course... and we refer to him as Shlee. I'm Ash) and his wife Amy, Michael and Kristi, Christoper (who is Michael's brother), and JP (Shlee's best friend... and well, he's a friend to us all! But just sayin'.) It ended up being a tie game. Here's a few pics.

Will and I outside the stadium

 National Anthem

 Ashley was presented with his own personalized jersey from the Dynamos

 Kristi and I... good friends

Will made this sign for Shlee

Fantastic 4- Will and I with Kristi and Michael

 Ash & Shlee

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Party Party Party

Hayden has been partying her butt off this month. Actually, she hit up two parties in one weekend and got to stay up past her bed time! And she went to a baby shower, too. The first party was the baby shower for her future friend Ally, who will soon be the new arrival of my friend Erin W. This is Erin's second daughter, in addition to her first daughter Avery, who will be three this December. Hayden wore the CUTEST outfit ever to the shower, a little Mudpie outfit with a ladybug shirt and bell bottom pants, and of course, her best bow. I had to wake her from a nap to leave, and she let me know how pissed she was about it the whole way there. It was crazy trying to juggle Hayden, diaper bag, purse, and gift and try to figure out which house it was, because there wasn't balloons or anything outside. Luckily, the host came to my rescue. Hayden screamed the first ten minutes and I was sweating like crazy, sitting in some stranger's bedroom, trying to nurse her to calm her down. She finally got there and sat like a little peach for the remainder of the party, even falling asleep at one point. Everyone exclaimed just how adorable she was. (I know.) ;)
Then, this past weekend, we drove out to Katy to visit our friends who just moved back to the United States from Norway. Kim, Isabel, and their children Daniel, Alexandra, and Sofie. I haven't seen them since my last trip to Norway in 2008, so I was very excited. We were a little nervous because we were leaving to head out there at what should have been time to start Hayden's bedtime ritual. But, we got there and Hayden was all smiles. She was in a great mood and let everyone have turns holding her. The little girls jumped on the couch and waited patiently for their turn, so cute. I was thrilled to see the kids and Kim and Isabel, and was happy to introduce them to Will and Hayden. Will had a great time too, which I was happy about. We got home about ten o' clock that night, and Hayden slept straight on until six in the morning. Woo hoo!
The last party of late was the very next day, Laken's second birthday party. Laken is the daughter of my best friend Jennie. Jennie and I always joke that when Hayden and Laken are driving around town being teenagers, we'll be following them on the down low, with our box of wine and binoculars. Luckily, we have a few years before all that goes down. Jennie and Will (her husband-- we both have Wills :) were having a BBQ to celebrate at their home for Laken's big day. Again, Hayden let herself be passed around-- she loves it! Her little buddy Austin was there, too, who is only two weeks younger than she is. He's the son of our good friend Angela. Angela kept bringing him up to Hayden saying, "Hey, girlfriend!" We got a good kick out of that. While she took a nap there, by the time the cake cutting came around, she was holding on by a string. It was like she only promised us one good party, and it was over. So we had to leave before presents, but ended up having a great time anyway. We have some great friends. Here's a few pics of all her celebrating:

Erin and Ally's baby shower

Hayden and Alexandra

 Hayden and Sofie

 Hayden and Laken

 Hayden and her daddy

 Looking so precious

Ash and Ang with our young in's

 Austin and Hayden checking each other out

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3 Months!

Well, Miss Hayden turned 3 months old on the fifth of the month, and she is just growing like a little weed. We've officially moved into size two diapers and she is weighing in at 13 pounds and 10 ounces. She rolls over quite a bit now (tummy to back) and is discovering new things everyday. Her most recent hobby is Disney Jr. on the telly. She loves the colors and moving images. As she grows older, we will have rules for the television in place (because she's not going to be one of those kids if her father and I have anything to do with it.... hopefully she'll be a reader and like to play outside) but for now, she likes it. She watches her Baby Einstein DVDs, too. She's also getting into her toys and is able to grab them and hold some of them. Sophie the Giraffe is the newest member of our family, and goes everywhere with us. She's also quite fond of her Baby Einstein radio; we never leave home without it. Just yesterday, she received a very special toy from my parents that was very sentimental. Growing up, my favorite toy/stuffed animal was Hattie, which was one of the Furskin bears made by Xavier Roberts, who also created the Cabbage Patch. Hattie went everywhere with me practically my entire life. And I mean that in the most literal way possible. I slept with her every night for some twenty five years, and I'm not ashamed to say it! She's worn thin and more than a little raggedy, but still very much loved. Well, my parents ordered Hayden her very own Hattie, and I was so surprised! Furskins have all but disappeared off the face of the Earth, so I couldn't believe it. And Hayden's Hattie is so fluffy full of stuffing and still has a belly button and fingers, which my Hattie lost long ago! It was an amazing gift that I will be sure Hayden keeps and always takes care of. It was so very thoughtful of them! Hayden also received another very special gift from a family friend this month-- Chris Kirklin quilted her an owl quilt that is so lovely and well made. It has owls on it and is in an array of bright colors, and what else is very special is that the brown patches she put in to match some of the owls is in a brown pixelated camouflage for my dad. She said that she prayed very hard for my dad when he had his heart attack, and that she prayed that he would be able to meet his grandchildren one day; and so for that, she added in the camo to represent him in the quilt. That made me cry a little.
I also think she's starting a little teething. She's drooling up a storm these days and has a constant fascination with her little hands and fingers. That used to be the sign that she was hungry, but no more. They are now the preference over teething rings, though I do have one that's little enough for her to hold, and it preoccupies her for about two minutes, then back to the fingers. She may not actually cut the tooth for a while, but it seems that they are beginning to make their presence known. I've used the teething tablets a couple of times and they seem to work wonders! They really calm her down. I was at my wit's end this week because she was constantly gnawing and having screaming crying fits, whereas she rarely cries and can't be comforted. It was heartbreaking as well as exhausting. She hardly slept at night for three nights, and I was running on fumes and emotionally spent. We swung, we drove around town at ungodly hours of night, we rocked, we cried, we paced, we patted, we sang, we vibrated, we listened to every white noise in the box to no avail. Thankfully my  mommy came to the rescue and tag teamed with me so I could get some rest. I took Hayden to the pediatrician to make sure it wasn't an ear infection or anything like that. It wasn't. Just a growth spurt, a little teething, and basically, a phase. Whew. Finally, last night, we got back to some kind of normal; and I'm hoping it continues.
After weeks of refusing bottles, yesterday and today she finally decided to accept some apple juice. Yea! Go Hayden! And we also tried some rice cereal for the first time (organic brown rice) mixed with some milk, and she loved it! She was a little befuddled by the spoon at first; she was wondering what kind of contraption I was trying to stick in her mouth besides that bloody silicone bottle nipple. After a few tries, she got the hang of it, and though she's not opening wide just yet, she really enjoyed it. I'm hoping it will help her get along a little longer through the nights. Breastfed babies get hungrier much faster than formula fed, so we still wake up anywhere from one to three times a night on a normal basis. She's just thriving away and makes us very happy that we have such a happy baby 99% of the time. Everyone comments on her happy demeanor, and it's something that I pray continues her whole life through.

Hayden and her Hattie

The Quilt (both sides)

Notice the camo

All she needs is Grandma!

Hayden and her Papa

Her love of shoes has began

Hayden laughing at Uncle Grant

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Blog Frenzy Today... New Favorite Commercial!

Today I have just blogged up a storm! It's important to me to get everything written out before I forget or before too much time has passed. It felt good to get caught up today! So, last one for the day-- it's time to get dinner on the stove.
Just so ya'll know, I've become obsessed with this new Target commerical about back to school! Every time it comes on, I make Will rewind it (he does it without being asked now) and I sing along. It's to the tune of Word Up! by Korn (originally by Cameo... but we all like Korn muuuch better, right?? Who is Cameo?) By the way, if you can't tell what he's saying at one particular part, he's saying "Harajuku"- Gwen Stefani's Target clothing line for girls. :)

The other Target commercial (also promoting back to school) has also grown on me. I didn't care too much for it at first. This chick is in like four commercials right now. But it's to the tune of "We Got the Beat" by the Go-Go's. And I love the Go-Go's. I'm a huge supporter of 80s anything. Plus, this chick is a spelling teacher in the commercial. We all know why I can't dis that! :) Not sure what's up with their lyrics and why they are sometimes nearly un-understandable, but it took me a while to figure out she was saying "Notebooks and jeans, notebooks and jeans, notebooks and jeans.... NOTEBOOKS AND JEANS!" But hey. Whatever. I know now. And still like it!

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